ROCKET REVIEW: STEEL PANTHER – “Lower The Bar” (CD)

American glam metal act, STEEL PANTHER, has always pushed their comedy skills hard on the rock world, but there’s one thing for sure, these dudes know how to write some ass kicking tunes. If you can stop for the better part of an hour giving a shit about the rest of the world going on around you and all the cookie cutter rock bands that sound the same being shoved down your throat on the radio, then you might just get into their new studio effort Lower The Bar & the fact that these crazy mofos are running around in spandex in the year 2017. Also, you are warned. Push aside the ‘risque’ titles of the songs. If you can get past that and a few sexually explicit words thrown in for shits n giggles along the way, you might actually make it through all eleven tracks. Nobody likes a Debbie Downer. Consider this a rock n roll party of the highest order.

Let your damn hair down for once and just have a good time. Kicking off with the rousing “Goin’ in the Backdoor”, vocalist Michael Starr, who does a near perfect David Lee Roth impersonation, over the top screams and all, leads his band of skilled musicians who use more hair product than Caitlyn Jenner down the road of rock n roll debauchery, proudly exclaiming “Anything Goes”, followed by his personal confession of being a longtime victim of “Poontang Boomerang”. That is the stalking scenario of a crazy as hell, free spirited chick you banged once who will not get out of your life. Producer Jay Ruston helms the high energy production, and on the next cut the momentum somehow manages to pick up. Up next is the raunchy power ballad “That’s When You Came In”, and then the absolute gem “Wrong Side of the Tracks (Out In Beverly Hills)” and “Now the Fun Starts”, which reminded me a lot of LOVE/HATE and Jizzy Pearl.

Guitarist Satchel, aka Russ Parrish, who used to play in Rob Halford’s FIGHT band project back in the nineties, can definitely shred. The ‘rock with your cock out’ rhythm section held down by drummer Stix Zadinia and bassist Lexxi Foxx on the next cuts are nothing to laugh at as the bands unloads my favorite rocker on the album, “Pussy Ain’t Free”, followed by “Wasted Too Much Time”, and “I Got What You Want.

The last handful of tunes don’t disappoint at all. “Wasted Too Much Time”, “I Got What You Want”, and “Walk of Shame” deliver more killer jams. The fun concludes with a cover of CHEAP TRICK’s “She’s Tight”, featuring Robin Zander. If you are looking for something that will put a smile on your face (which doesn’t run yah $200 for an hour date with a hooker) and doesn’t take things too seriously, pick up this album and show all your friends and family how cool you are.

ROCKET REVIEW:

STEEL PANTHER – “Lower The Bar” (CD)
(Open E Music/2017)

1. Goin’ in the Backdoor
2. Anything Goes
3. Poontang Boomerang
4. That’s When You Came In
5. Wrong Side of the Tracks (Out In Beverly Hills)
6. Now the Fun Starts
7. Pussy Ain’t Free
8. Wasted Too Much Time
9. I Got What You Want
10. Walk of Shame
11. She’s Tight (featuring Robin Zander)