ROCKET RANT – LARS ULRICH: Only One BIG FOUR Show In America?

ROCKET RANT – LARS ULRICH:
Only One BIG FOUR Show In America?

Lars… you’ve got one special knack for pissing off a lot of people.

Even Obama – who is surely busy doctoring his fake American birth certificate as I type this – has to be saying, “Boy, that Lars Ulrich fucked this one up big time!”

Lars, I wonder how you would have felt if when Metallica played their very first live gig that instead of applauding the entire crowd got up at the end of the first song and all – but one person – exited the venue and drove clear across county lines to watch a different ‘unknown’ thrash metal band perform.



I will tell you how he would have felt, Den Headz, “shitty and alone”, just like the way he’s made many red blooded Americans feel… who listen to Heavy Metal music… and have pretty much been left out by his decision to book merely one BIG FOUR date in the states, when in all reality it’s the U.S. fans who made Metallica, Megadeth, Slayer and Anthrax the millionaires they are, am I right? I say book more shows, Lars, F-A-S-T or you’re going to have mutiny within the metal music community and, man, we just can’t take another negative hit like this in the American metal scene… before it truly does meet its demise! What kind of statement does Lars think this is making to the fans in the U.S.? Judging from the onslaught of negative responses Metallica is getting from the American metal media right now, it sounds like ole Lars may have made his most boneheaded move yet!

“Big Four post ‘94 = shit hoagie.”

I love the thought process on this one though, Den Headz. Here’s what Lars had to say when questioned about the single Big Four US date:

“We don’t wanna sort of overstay the welcome, and we don’t know what kind of response there’s gonna be to this in America.”

Come again, brother? You aren’t sure if America is going to support the four biggest metal bands in the world… umm… THE COUNTRY RESPONSIBLE FOR MAKING EACH OF YOUR ACTS FAMOUS IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Lars, you need to pass over some of that Cannabis cup shit you been smoking, dude… cause I want a hit!




It’s totally all about the money though, isn’t it? Let’s just come clean.

Lars knows that booking a full list of dates for a Big Four in America tour may turn out to be a losing financial proposition… and hey, with the current poor US economic climate that’s totally understandable, but doesn’t mean that’s how things ‘would’ necessarily turn out. I think if promoted properly that a BIG FOUR tour in the states, I’m talking booking it in twenty to thirty of the best cities for rock concerts, would SELL OUT EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!!!

This is not some nostalgia trip, Lars. This is history you’re messing with!

So… just play it safe with the band’s money and go the simple ‘one show’ route, is that it? Seriously? Is that the right thing to do, Lars. Really? I mean, the hundreds of millions of dollars you already earned with your metal band just isn’t enough at this point? I dunno, maybe from a PR standpoint you guys could have sat down with your shrinks and business attorneys and realized that this kind of decision could be career fucking suicide. Well, on second thought… you guys survived Load and Reload (ahem… of shit!), so who knows.. maybe you figured yourselves as Teflon Dons of the metal world… I dunno, but the reality is… music fans are like elephants. They are cool until you make them really mad and then they will just step on top of you… and squash you like you were never there in the first place. Capiche?

Is this ‘rant’ a threat? No. Not at all. Me personally, I’m still gonna listen to metal music, all kinds of it, day in and day out, nothing will ever stop that… nothing ever has. Yes, Metallica is still one of my all-time favorite metal bands… but I feel this is another black mark on their incredible musical legacy that could have been easily avoided… not to mention all the pissed off forty somethings they must now contend with in America that want Lars’ head on a plate!!

Lars, BTW – it’s “Puff, Puff, Pass”, bro… so hand that shit over to your boy Rocket!

http://www.metallica.com/